The Divine Miss Kim

In 2008, Marty and I were facing bleak times. Dialysis was coming down the pike, we were fighting  battle with renal failure and the state of California budget woes. We had been through hell since December of 2005, as an emotional person it was tough and I was finding ways to cope. My bowling partner Tammy told me to read the Twilight series. I immediately was hooked, I watched the first movie and was curious about the chemistry of the two leads in the film. Of course, I couldn't just be idle, I started looking it up online and wondering if they were together?

I met a lady in Boston online, she was curious as well and on a message board. After working with Candace's message board, I wasn't leery of them any longer and so I joined. At this time, I had a locked Twitter account that I only talked to Di and Andrea on plus a couple of other friends whom I knew in real life. I did NOT talk to stranger on Twitter...ever.

T from Boston convinced me to add her, a lady Susie from California by way of IN and a lady Jules. I added them and started talking to them. T introduced me to two ladies Elena and Kim @kgirl1899,  she thought we would get along great. She was right we did get along great!

Kim loved Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart together and loved being a detective trying to find out more about them. We all got pretty wrapped up in it from 2008-2011. It was my outlet when Marty was sick, my break with reality. Kim and the other Twi tweeps were there for me during some of my darkest days. There were about 100 of them by the time our circle was complete. Kim and T introduced me to the writers of Fan fiction and reading fan fiction, they are how I met ALE and my other writing friends.

When Marty was put on dialysis, they were there. They were there, when we would end up in the hospital and they were there when we got ''the call''.

Kim was a vibrant person, she was a true blue New Yorker, she made no bones about how she felt about things and never apologized for her opinion. She was loud, funny, loved to stir the pot and watch it boil. She really was like a flame burning brightly. I loved when she would call me on the phone and say, ''What's up?'' like I had called her and her time was important. Kim was just Kim to know her was to know her fully.

Kim lost her mom as a young girl, I know that death deeply affected her and she lived her life fully with an unparalleled joie d'vivre. She loved going to movies, shows and concerts. She would travel all over the world for work and was always meeting up with someone and having fun.

When I moved to TN, she told me that she was going to take a road trip to see me. She wanted me to take her to see all the Whiskey distilleries in the area. I could just see her in her navy blue Audi convertible, top down, music blaring heading my way. Once again, I find myself devastated we never got to me in person.

I was actually sitting at my desk at work last night, thinking about how I finally want to meet up with my Twi besties and get a picture together. As always, it hasn't happened yet and 2014 was going to be the year. I saw a picture of R and K on my neighbors desk and thought about my Twi besties. This was before I found out the news later in the evening. It was like God was preparing my heart for what was to come.

I learned many lessons being Kim's friend. Women in small groups can often eat their own and sometimes we had tough times. We all would and did drive each other crazy in the early years of our Twitter friendship. This year it has been five years since we've all been friends. I have lost other tweeps but this is our first loss in this group and none of us would have ever thought it would be Kim.

Last Monday night, she tweeted she felt dizzy. Immediately I sensed something off and asked what other symptoms she was feeling? she said a headache like sinus pain. She said her husband brought her some Advil. She made it sound like they were both not feeling well and I thought maybe they had the flu. My Twitter besties ( that is what we call each other except for Tiybor who is Sis and Lisa who is Twin) and I started worrying after Kim was silent for a few days. We all tried calling and texting her, it was normal she would take breaks but unusual for her to not answer her phone.I really thought it was something to do with her Dad who was fighting cancer. I never imagined what would happen next........

Kim's husband tweeted she had a stroke last Monday night and passed away yesterday morning. I called our bestie Melinda and asked if it was true and she confirmed. I cried all night long, woke up this morning still stunned and in grief. Kim was 39 years old, she would've been forty on Christmas day. I truly cannot fathom that she is gone from this world.

There is something VERY special about the Twi group, we have been together many years. Many of us have moved on from the celebrity end of it but the friendships have grown and bloomed into beautiful flowers. Women who love and support one another for who they are as humans and people. We have lived a lot of life together transplants, family issues,health crises, divorces, death, child rearing and the fun stuff too. They are the first strangers I ever knew on Twitter who now are like family.

Every morning one of us tweets @mram71 @tiybor @baseball31 @kgirl1899 " Good morning besties, have a great day.'' My TL will be littered with their responses throughout the day. We have been doing it for so many years now. It will not be the same without Kim being a part, something will always be missing and it will be her.

This morning I have been thinking of Kim. Smiling and thinking of how she in the end is bringing us all together. How she worked hard and played hard, she loved deeply and fiercely never wavering in her opinions or from who she was as a person. I enjoyed our last year of friendship, it was easy and special. We accepted each other as is and just had fun.

Kim lived by my favorite Auntie Mame quote and I think it sums her up perfectly, '' Live! Live!Live! Life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death.''

She lived her life like a flame burning brightly....it may have been dimmed out but now she will be a star burning brightly above us. I love you bestie, rest in peace my friend.

My thoughts are with her husband Rob and her father. Praying for your family today and always. I am so sorry for your loss.

to my ladies from the cone of silence, you all are special to me in your own ways and I am thankful for all the years we've had together. These songs are for you:

today as we work and live, let's smile and remember Kim



Who knew a book and a couple of celebrities would make a wonderful group of friends. I cry everytime I hear this song and think of all of you



I've learned that anything can bring people together. I am always open to things even though they may be odd to others because I know they can bring wonderful people into your life. Don't ever close yourself off to new experiences and people.

When a Book Becomes More

A few years ago, my bowling partner told me to read the Twilight Books. I had heard of them on television and knew my twelve year old cousin Alex was reading them. I really don't like vampire stories and was reluctant to read them.  Marty once took me to see Interview with a Vampire on a date and lived to regret it. I showed up to my grandparents house at five a.m. the next day terrified. I like to read anything but Sci-Fi, Horror, Westerns, or Suspense. I really like biographies, romance and historical fiction.

I am really big on not judging a book by it's cover for people but often will skip over a real book. I totally judged the Twilight books. So I took our bowling partner Tammy's advice and I read the first book. I read it so fast I was calling my friends teen son to bring me the next book. I read the entire series cover to cover in seven days. I had just missed the first film in theaters and had to wait for it to come out on DVD.

I loved the story of true love waits and conquerors. I loved the characters and it really took me back to all the feelings of being a teenager. These aren't the best books ever written and in fact, the last book is so over the top that most cannot stand it.

It was during the wait for the DVD of the first film I started reading about the actors in the films. I at first didn't like the casting and felt several of the actors were all wrong. This story is a great visual story and you definitely have a clear picture in your head while reading them. During my search for info on the actors I came across a small website dedicated to them. Through this website I was introduced to women all over the world.

I became part of a club of sorts. People who felt passionate about this story, the films and a couple of actors in the films. It led me to reading original works of fiction that were based on the Twilight characters. From this I met several talented writers some of whom have gone on to re-work and publish their stories.

I have been supported by these women, supported these women. We talked life, family, kids, prayed for them and shared some great memories. When Marty was sick, this franchise gave me a much needed outlet and distraction. I often feel like the diversion saved me from a nervous breakdown.

 Today as I sat in the theater watching the films, I was filled with so many emotions. I saw Twilight for the first time on the big screen and finally came to love it.

I remembered waiting for all of the films to be finished and seeing set pictures and leaks with friends. I remembered the days of wondering if Rob and Kristen were a couple and the search for information on that.

This became about so much more than a book, a film or a story.

From sitting in lines for a midnight showings with my friend Heather three times. Sharing it with my friends kids and my friend Sam. I've never so anxiously awaited a film from books that I loved. We loved watching them together and dissecting them to nitpick whether the film makers got it right or not? For me, I really have never loved one of them until today. Tonight for the first time, I walked out of the theater happy about the film. The second part of Breaking Dawn had a lot to capture and they got it right.

If I hadn't of read the books? I would have missed out on so much. Most importantly, the countless friendships around the world this book brought. Fanette from France? met via Twilight. My beloved friend ALE? met via Twilight. The list of names goes on, someone from every walk of life from countries across the globe.

This book became more than a book. As the last scene played out tears fell down my face. Tears of sadness the series has ended, tears because I wish ALE were here to see it, tears from so many wonderful memories since 2008. I am so glad that I took a chance and left my comfort zone, I would've missed out.

I've often hidden this little secret hobby of sorts but today I feel the need to share. Call me silly, call me a nerd, call me a dork, judge my choice of reading material, do whatever you like. This is purely a Just Jules sort of moment. I am who I am and not ashamed to say it.