Saturday, May 27, 2006


I am looking forward to the summer with excitement and angst. How could that be? you ask. Looking forward to seeing friends I dont see during the school yr. and having fun with the kids. BUT the sale of my grandparents house looms large over the summer. You say "It's just a house?" no it isnt. It is the only home I have ever known really. When my parents divorced when I was 13 we spent every visitation with my dad there. Long before that my family had a habit of spending Fri- TGIF watching ABC and having pizza, Sat- swim days and Sun- swimming and more fun. My parents never really owned a home once I was past 5 and so the only places I had were my grandparents house. It was my safe haven and the place in my heart I call home. I know why the house has to be sold and am not against that in any way. It is going to be like another death in the family really truthfully. So I feel the waiting again the waiting for something to happen and know it's coming. I am looking forward to getting together and having a last slumber party and shindig before it's gone. We had lot's of those and my family is famous for them. We had carte blanche when we were kids there was pretty much nothing we couldnt do. Only one time did I move my Grandma's table and roll up the rug to make a skating rink for the younger kids. Yeah, that pretty much pissed her off and made her mad at us. It was my idea! We swam the summer away in the pool and were all good swimmers SOME OF US better than others mainly the two of us J names. Our friends could come. We would have parties there mainly always a birthday party and back to school parties. Can a house be more than just a building? yes, the building eventually gets rebuilt, woven and painted with memories. It will be sad but I cant wait for it to be over. I want to get out of grieving and back to life. Even though each day get's better and overall I have been better and better. Just some thoughts deep from within my heart.